So, you and you friend have gotten into a fight. What now?
A few years ago, I hurt a friend. It wasn't on purpose. There was a conflict between my friend and another person. I thought that I was being helpful - a bridge-builder per se. I stuck my nosy nose into the situation and gave my worthless two cents. The next day, my girlfriend called in tears to let me know that my well-meaning words put her in an awful position. I felt awful. I'd hurt my friend.
Have you ever been hurt by a friend? Have you ever been the one to hurt a friend's feelings? No matter which side you find yourself on, it's painful all the way around!
After last week's Better Together episode with my guest, Natalie Chambers Snapp, I heard from many women who've dealt with friendship break-ups, heartache, betrayal and pain. It's so hard sometimes!
I love how Natalie shared her "PEG System" to help her think through friendship conflict. Here's an explanation and something that you can consider if you have a friendship that is broken right now:
Pray - Instead of taking our pain to friends, take your pain to God and ask for clarity on what's going on.
Examine - Ask yourself tough questions like:
Go Straight to that Person - Direct dialogue, but Natalie lists a few conditions in the podcast.
This podcast is jam-packed with solid Biblical insight about not only friendships, but Natalie challenges our hearts to realize where God needs to work within us.
REMEMBER: I'm giving away a copy of Natalie's NEW Becoming Heart Sisters Bible study! It's available at Christian retailers nationwide, but you can enter to win a copy by clicking here and leaving a comment on the podcast blog page. Winner will be drawn on June 5.
CLICK HERE to leave a review about this episode on iTunes.
About Natalie…
Author Natalie Chambers Snapp uses her own and others’ stories of successes and failures to illustrate what she has learned about girlfriend relationships. Healthy boundaries, honesty, tact, sharing, and agape love all play a part in being and maintaining a circle of close confidants. She also deals with the inevitable challenges that face many relationships including how to handle conflict; life changes like a new baby, move or divorce; and when it is right to “break-up” with your friend.
What is it with women and friendships?
As much as we know that we need good girlfriends, we can't seem to stop ourselves from friendship drama! We're surrounded by a culture that has dipped the term "BFF" in 24 carat gold, so if you don't have a BFF, then you're hopelessly alone forever. On the other hand, we're flooded with "Real" television shows that make backbiting, pettiness and betrayal the norm. Recently, one "Housewife" was kicked off her reality television show because she spread rumors about another housewife plans to drug another woman. What's going on here? Do we even know what good friendships look like anymore?
Today, I'm talking with my friend, Natalie Snapp, author of the Bible study, Heart Sisters: A Bible Study on Authentic Friendships. She's a strong, courageous sister in Christ whose life experiences have given her a passion for helping women develop healthy authentic relationships with each other. Her writings specifically address women who've been hurt by friendships and are looking for healing.
In this episode, Natalie tells us about the bullying that she endured in high school from other girls. She'll also tell us about what happened when she realized that her non-Christian friends seemed to handle friendship conflict better than her Christian friends.
You'll learn about the two ingredients that all healthy, authentic relationships must have as well as learn how your mother's approach to friendship may have impacted your life.
GIVEAWAY: I'm giving away a free copy of Natalie's Bible Study, Becoming Heart Sisters on June 5. Enter by posting a comment on the blog page for this podcast.
About Natalie...
Author Natalie Chambers Snapp uses her own and others’ stories of successes and failures to illustrate what she has learned about girlfriend relationships. Healthy boundaries, honesty, tact, sharing, and agape love all play a part in being and maintaining a circle of close confidants. She also deals with the inevitable challenges that face many relationships including how to handle conflict; life changes like a new baby, move or divorce; and when it is right to “break-up” with your friend.
Last week, it rained for several days straight in my little corner of the world. It rained enough that I regretted passing up that fabulous pair of rainboots that I saw at the store. My soggy sneakers held up just fine...
Since we experience all four seasons in my area of the country, heavy spring rains always seem to wash away the last vestiges of winter and pour in the freshness of the spring season.
Is your life ready to embrace spring?
Did you know that every season has a metaphor? If you aren't familiar with this concept, here's a quick overview:
So, now it's spring. Do you feel fresh and hopeful? I'm trying to be! After a long winter, I need to fill my tanks a little after a long winter. So, these days, I'm focused on finding things that inspire me toward godly momentum and creativity.
One of my main places of inspiration is walking outside. There's something about the fresh air and walking underneath God's big blue sky that just makes me feel close to God. And I LOVE flowers! Lucky for me, I live in a historical neighborhood filled with lots of amazing gardens.
Another source of inspiration is when I travel to speaking events. As I write out this paragraph, many of your faces that I've met over the past few months float across my memory - and make me smile. I'm inspired when I think about all of the women that I've met and all of the stories that I've heard.
For me, being inspired is all about putting myself in situations where my heart, mind and soul can be connected to God and connected to others who also long to be connected to God.
I don't know about you, but the farther I get away from God, the more draining life seems to be. So, my goal each day is to make purposeful plans to find connections with God and others such as.
Here's a quick list of six ways that I find inspiration:
1. Walking outside and focusing on God's beauty of creation,
2. Sitting with a friend over coffee as she tells me about how God is stretching or growing her faith,
3. Attending a conference or event that will challenge me in my faith or help me expand my skills,
4. Consuming books or listening to podcasts by people who write/speak about their faith or craft,
5. Journaling or reading old journal entries to see how God has stretched and grown my faith.
6. Traveling to new places and meeting new people lets me see faith from lots of different and powerful perspectives.
Now, this is my list. But, it's not the be-all-end-all list. However, if you're looking for some ideas, perhaps my list might motivate you to create your own list.
Don't forget, inspiration is essential for living!
Inspiration keeps us moving forward. Inspiration is essential for resilience and keeping us hopeful. Inspiration keeps us looking toward the future when we're tempted to focus on the past or the negative circumstances in the present.
So, what should go on your inspiration list? Share what inspires you in the comments on the blog page for this podcast episode.
My friend Cathy West joins me for this week's Better Together episode and shares how she finds inspiration for her stories. Her newest book, The Memory of You, just released a few weeks ago and Cathy gives us some inside scoop about a powerful story that many of us can relate to. Cathy also explains why fiction stories have the power to help us work through some of our struggles.
Click here to find out more about this story of a woman who deals with PTSD after the death of her sister. She discovers the freeing power of forgiveness, confession and faith.
About Catherine West...
INSPY Award-winning author Catherine West writes stories of hope and healing from her island home in Bermuda. When she’s not at the computer working on her next story, you can find her taking her Border Collie for long walks or reading books by her favorite authors. She and her husband have two grown children.